My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.
Jimmy Durante
There is only one thing for a man to do who is married to a woman who enjoys spending money, and that is to enjoy earning it.
Edgar Watson Howe
No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as a dog does. If you chat with him a while, gradually building up the argument and the intonation, he relishes it so that he will roll all around the floor, lie on his back kicking and groaning with joyous worship. Very few wives are so affected.
Christopher Morley
Choose a friend as thou dost a wife, till death separate you.
William Penn
There is nothing more admirable than when two people who see eye to eye keep house as man and wife, confounding their enemies and delighting their friends.
Homer
Only two things are necessary to keep one's wife happy. One is to let her think she is having her way, and the other, to let her have it.
Lyndon Baines Johnson
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